Key Theme: The Importance of Intentional Relationships, Submission, and Godly Counsel
Introduction: The Power of the Right Voices
No one fulfills their God-given purpose alone; it is through collaboration, support, and shared experiences with others that we discover our true calling. Each individual’s unique talents and perspectives contribute to a larger tapestry of purpose, guiding and inspiring one another. Whether through friendship, mentorship, or community, the journey of fulfilling our divine mission is often enhanced by the relationships we cultivate along the way. Thus, understanding that we are part of a collective endeavor can empower us to embrace our paths more fully and joyfully.
God designed us for relationships—fellowship, mentorship, and accountability.
However, having the right people in your life is not accidental. It requires:
- Intentionality – You must seek and cultivate relationships that align with God’s purpose.
- Willingness – You must open your heart to be guided, corrected, and encouraged.
- Submission – You must humbly receive wisdom and counsel from godly voices.
David’s life illustrates the three key relationships that every believer needs:
- A faithful friend (Jonathan)—someone who walks with you.
- A spiritual family (David’s mighty men and community)—a group that strengthens you.
- A mentor or spiritual father (Samuel)—someone who speaks wisdom into your life.
Let’s explore how these relationships help us fulfill God’s purpose.
1. You Need a FRIEND – someone who walks with you
1 Samuel 18:1-4 – Jonathan’s Covenant with David
“Now when he had finished speaking to Saul, the soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul… Then Jonathan and David made a covenant, because he loved him as his own soul.”
- Jonathan was the son of King Saul, yet he chose to support David even though it meant losing his right to the throne, demonstrating his remarkable loyalty and selflessness in the face of familial and political obligations.
- He was not just a companion—he was a covenant friend who encouraged David spiritually, emotionally, and physically, offering unwavering support during the hardest times, inspiring him to pursue his calling, and standing by his side through trials and triumphs alike.
Deeper Revelation
- God often sends people who will stand with you in difficult seasons, offering support and encouragement when you need it the most, reminding you that you are not alone in your struggles.
- A real friend is not just someone who agrees with you—but someone who pushes you toward God’s purpose, encouraging you to grow spiritually and to reflect on your choices, constantly inspiring you to seek a deeper understanding of your faith and the path that God has laid out for you. This type of friend will often be the one who challenges your thinking, prompting you to explore the scriptures more deeply, and holds you accountable in your spiritual journey, ensuring that you remain focused on your divine calling and the mission that God has entrusted to you in this life.
- True friendships are based on faithfulness, not convenience; they endure through trials and challenges, and they nurture a bond that transcends temporary circumstances and requires mutual trust and understanding.
Supporting Scriptures
Proverbs 17:17 – “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.” God-designed friendships are built for times of trouble, not just times of ease, as they provide strength and support in our most challenging moments, helping us navigate through life’s storms while celebrating the joys together in the good times as well.
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 – “Two are better than one… for if they fall, one will lift up his companion.” A true friend will strengthen you when you feel weak, providing unwavering support and encouragement to help you rise above challenges and navigate through difficult times with confidence.
Why Do We Need a Friend?
- We Need Encouragement in Our Journey
- 1 Samuel 23:16 – “Then Jonathan, Saul’s son, arose and went to David in the woods and strengthened his hand in God.”
- Jonathan strengthened David’s faith when he was discouraged and running from Saul, offering him unwavering support and encouragement, reminding him of the promises made to him, and reinforcing the bond of friendship that they shared during those challenging times.
- A true friend will remind you of God’s promises when you feel like giving up, lifting your spirit and providing encouragement during the most challenging times, reminding you that hope and faith can light your path forward.
- We Need Protection and Support
- Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 – “Two are better than one… For if they fall, one will lift up his companion.”
- A true friend does not just celebrate victories but walks with you through struggles, always offering support and encouragement during difficult times, ensuring that you never have to face your challenges alone, and reminding you of your strength and resilience in the process.
- Jonathan protected David from Saul’s plans, showing that friendship includes loyalty and sacrifice, demonstrating the profound bond they shared and the lengths one would go to for a true friend.
- We Need People Who Help Us Stay Accountable
- Proverbs 27:17 – “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.”
- A real friend does not just agree with you; they challenge you to grow, support you through thick and thin, and encourage you to step outside your comfort zone to become the best version of yourself.
“A God-given friend is not just someone who stands beside you, but someone who helps you walk in God’s calling.”
Application:
- Do you have a godly friend who strengthens your faith?
- Are you that kind of friend to someone else?
2. You Need a COMMUNITY – A Spiritual Family that loves you and supports you
1 Samuel 22:1-2 – David’s Community in the Cave of Adullam
“David therefore departed from there and escaped to the cave of Adullam. So when his brothers and all his father’s house heard it, they went down there to him. And everyone who was in distress, everyone who was in debt, and everyone who was discontented gathered to him. So he became captain over them. And there were about four hundred men with him.”
- David’s community was not strong warriors at first—they were broken people whom God transformed into mighty men, shaping them through trials and tribulations, teaching them resilience and courage as they learned to trust in His greater plan for their lives.
- These men fought valiantly for David, stood resolutely with him during his trials, and later played a crucial role in helping him become king, ensuring the stability of his reign and the prosperity of his people.
- God places us in a spiritual family not just for support, but for growth and preparation, allowing us to navigate life’s challenges together, learn from one another’s experiences, and foster deeper connections that enrich our faith and understanding.
Deeper Revelation
- Your spiritual family is not about perfect people, but about growing together in Christ, nurturing each other’s faith, supporting one another through trials, and celebrating the joys of our spiritual journeys together, enabling us to become stronger in our beliefs and more compassionate in our interactions with others along the way.
- Community is where you learn, serve, and find accountability, forging meaningful connections and building lasting relationships that foster growth and support throughout your journey.
- Isolation leads to weakness, but godly community leads to strength, fostering unity, encouragement, and resilience among individuals, allowing them to support one another through challenges, share their experiences, and grow together in faith and character, ultimately creating a nurturing environment where everyone can thrive.
- Hebrews 10:24-25 – “Let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together… but encouraging one another.”
- We are called to grow together in faith, nurturing our spiritual journey, supporting one another in our beliefs, and fostering a community that reflects our commitment to understanding and living out our shared values.
- Proverbs 27:17 – “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.”
- A true community helps refine your character by providing support, feedback, and opportunities for growth, nurturing your strengths while also challenging your weaknesses.
“Your spiritual family is not just where you receive, but where you grow, serve, and prepare for your calling.”
Application
- Are you actively involved in a church or small group where you are growing?
- How can you contribute to your spiritual family?
3. You Need a Mentor – A Spiritual Father, Someone Who Speaks Wisdom into Your Life.
1 Samuel 16:12-13 – Samuel Anoints David
“Then the LORD said, ‘Arise, anoint him; for this is the one!’ Then Samuel took the horn of oil and anointed him in the midst of his brothers; and the Spirit of the LORD came upon David from that day forward.”
- Samuel recognized David’s calling before anyone else did, understanding deep within his heart the significance of this pivotal moment and the vast potential that lay ahead for the future leader of Israel, who would ultimately fulfill the divine plan and unite the people under his reign, bringing forth an unprecedented era of prosperity and faith.
- He mentored David spiritually and prepared him for kingship through various teachings, sharing invaluable life lessons and guiding him in making wise decisions that would enable him to lead with integrity and strength. Through these teachings, he instilled a deep sense of responsibility and empathy, ensuring that David understood the weight of his future role as a leader. He also emphasized the importance of maintaining a close connection with his faith, enabling David to seek divine guidance and wisdom in times of uncertainty.
- Without Samuel’s guidance, anointing, and wisdom, David would not have stepped into his purpose, as these vital elements were instrumental in shaping his journey and ultimately leading him to fulfill the destiny that had been laid out for him.
Deeper Revelation
- A spiritual father sees what God has placed inside of you—even before you do. He recognizes your potential, often envisioning your path and destiny with clarity, guiding you towards your true purpose even when you feel lost or unsure. His understanding transcends mere observation; he perceives the intricate tapestry of your gifts, dreams, and the divine calling woven within your heart. This deep insight allows him to nurture your growth and encourage you to embrace your journey, reminding you of the extraordinary plans God has for your life even in times of doubt or confusion.
- Mentors bring valuable guidance, thoughtful correction, and sincere encouragement, fostering growth and development in their mentees while helping them navigate challenges and discover their potential. This relationship is built on trust and respect, allowing for open communication and honest feedback. Ultimately empowering them to achieve their goals and become effective leaders in their own right, mentors serve as role models, instilling confidence and resilience as they journey through personal and professional challenges.
- A spiritual father is not just a teacher, but someone deeply invested in your growth, guiding you through life’s challenges and helping you find strength in your faith. This profound relationship fosters a nurturing environment where questions are welcomed, wisdom is shared, and personal development is encouraged, allowing you to navigate not only spiritual matters but also the complexities of everyday life with confidence and resilience.
- Proverbs 11:14 – “Where there is no counsel, the people fall; but in the multitude of counselors there is safety.”
- Without godly mentorship, we are prone to mistakes, often stumbling in our journey, leading us to experiences that may not align with our true purpose and vision.
- 2 Timothy 1:6-7 – “Therefore I remind you to stir up the gift of God which is in you through the laying on of my hands.”
- Paul reminded Timothy that a spiritual father helps activate God’s calling by providing guidance, encouragement, and accountability in the pursuit of one’s divine purpose and mission.
“A spiritual father doesn’t just teach you lessons—he helps shape your destiny.”
Application
- Do you have a mentor or spiritual leader who speaks into your life?
- Are you willing to receive correction and guidance?
Conclusion: The Right People Will Shape Your Destiny
David’s life teaches us that we need:
A Friend (Jonathan) – Someone who strengthens us in our faith.
A Spiritual Family (Mighty Men & Community) – A group where we grow together.
A Mentor or Spiritual Father (Samuel) – Someone who speaks wisdom and destiny over us.
Final Challenge:
- Be intentional—pursue godly friendships, a strong community, and mentorship.
- Be willing—open your heart to encouragement, correction, and growth.
- Be submissive—humble yourself under wise counsel.
How Samuel Mentored David Spiritually and Prepared Him for Kingship
Samuel played a crucial role in mentoring David. He not only anointed him as king but also taught him spiritual principles, leadership wisdom, and character formation that shaped David into a ruler after God’s own heart (1 Samuel 13:14).
Let’s explore how Samuel mentored David spiritually and prepared him for kingship, supported by scriptural references.
1. Samuel Anointed David and Confirmed His Calling
1 Samuel 16:12-13 – Anointing David as King
“Then the LORD said, ‘Arise, anoint him; for this is the one!’ Then Samuel took the horn of oil and anointed him in the midst of his brothers; and the Spirit of the LORD came upon David from that day forward.”
A. Samuel Recognized God’s Calling in David Before Others Did
- Samuel, as a spiritual father, saw the potential in David before anyone else, recognizing the divine purpose that lay within him and understanding the impact his future would have on the nation of Israel.
- God does not look at outward appearance but at the heart (1 Samuel 16:7). This passage reminds us that true worth and character are found within, emphasizing the importance of sincerity and integrity over superficial qualities.
A mentor sees beyond where you are and speaks into where you are going.
B. Samuel Taught David to Trust in God’s Timing
- David did not become king immediately. He had to go through a process of preparation before fulfilling his calling.
- 1 Samuel 16:13-14 (NIV): “So Samuel took the horn of oil and anointed him in the presence of his brothers, and from that day on the Spirit of the Lord came powerfully upon David. Samuel then went to Ramah. Now the Spirit of the Lord had departed from Saul, and an evil spirit from the Lord tormented him.”
- Psalm 105:19 (NIV): “Till what he foretold came to pass, till the word of the Lord proved him true.”
- Ecclesiastes 3:1 – “For everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven.”
- Psalm 37:7 – “Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for Him.”
- Many leaders fail because they try to rush into their calling without allowing God to prepare them.
“A spiritual father sees what you are becoming, not just where you are today.”
2. Samuel Taught David the Weight of Responsibility and Empathy in Leadership
A. Leadership is a Responsibility, Not Just a Position
- Samuel taught David that kingship was about serving God and His people, not about power; he emphasized the importance of humility, compassion, and making decisions that reflect the values of justice and mercy. He reminded him of 1 Samuel 12:14, which states: “If you will fear the Lord and serve Him and obey His voice, and not rebel against the commandment of the Lord, then both you and also the king who reigns over you will continue following the Lord your God.”
- Deuteronomy 17:18-20 – “And when he sits on the throne of his kingdom, he shall write for himself in a book a copy of this law… that he may learn to fear the LORD his God by keeping all the words of this law and these statutes, and doing them.”
- David’s leadership later reflected this responsibility as he sought to govern according to God’s law.
B. A Leader Must Have Empathy for the People
- Samuel demonstrated compassion and justice as a judge of Israel (1 Samuel 7:15-17), showing his unwavering commitment to fairness and integrity in his decisions, which earned him the respect and admiration of the people he served, fostering a sense of trust and stability within the community and reinforcing the importance of ethical leadership in times of uncertainty.
- Proverbs 29:14 – “If a king faithfully judges the poor, his throne will be established forever.”
- David later led with the same heart for the people, caring for the broken and leading with mercy.
“Authority is not given for self-exaltation, but for service and responsibility.”
3. Samuel Instilled the Importance of Maintaining a Close Relationship with God
1 Samuel 19:18-20 David Seeks Refuge with Samuel
“Now David fled and escaped, and came to Samuel at Ramah and told him all that Saul had done to him. And he and Samuel went and stayed at Naioth.”
A. Samuel Taught David to Seek Divine Guidance in Uncertainty
- When David faced danger and uncertainty, he ran to Samuel, his mentor, seeking guidance and solace in the wisdom he had always shared, knowing that his support would provide the strength he desperately needed during such tumultuous times.
- Psalm 91:1-2 – “He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.”
- A spiritual mentor teaches us to seek God’s presence, not just human solutions.
B. The Importance of Obedience Over Sacrifice
- 1 Samuel 15:22 – “Behold, to obey is better than sacrifice, and to listen than the fat of rams.”
- Samuel’s rejection of Saul taught David that disobedience leads to failure, illustrating the critical importance of remaining faithful to God’s commandments and the dire consequences that can arise when one strays from the path of righteousness.
- John 14:15 – “If you love me, you will keep my commandments.”
“A true leader does not depend on his own strength, but constantly seeks divine wisdom.”
4. Samuel Taught David How to Make Wise Decisions
A. The Role of Wisdom in Leadership
- Proverbs 4:7 – “Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom. And in all your getting, get understanding.”
- David’s ability to make wise and strategic choices in battle, effective governance, and navigating personal struggles was profoundly shaped and influenced by Samuel’s invaluable mentorship, which provided guidance through challenges and instilled a deep sense of discernment.
B. Learning from Saul’s Mistakes
- Samuel warned David about the dangers of pride and impatience through Saul’s failure, emphasizing how these traits can lead to downfall and separation from God’s favor, ultimately reminding David to remain humble and patient in his future endeavors.
- 1 Samuel 13:13-14 – “You have done foolishly. You have not kept the command of the LORD your God… but now your kingdom shall not continue.”
- David learned humility and patience, understanding that obedience leads to longevity in leadership.
“A wise leader learns from both the successes and failures of those before him.”
5. Samuel’s Influence Helped David Stay Humble and Faithful
A. David Learned That Success Comes from God, Not from Himself
“Unless the Lord builds the house, the builders labor in vain.” – Psalm 127:1
- Even in success, David remained humble and dependent on God, a principle Samuel instilled in him, understanding that true greatness comes not just from achievements but from recognizing the need for divine guidance and strength in every aspect of his life.
B. Samuel Taught David to Always Rely on God’s Strength
- Psalm 18:2 – “The LORD is my rock, my fortress, and my deliverer; my God, my strength, in whom I will trust.”
- David learned from Samuel that his success did not come from military power or personal skill, but from God alone.
“The greatest leaders are those who never stop depending on God.”
Conclusion: The Impact of Samuel’s Mentorship on David’s Life
Samuel’s mentorship shaped David into the greatest king Israel had ever seen.
How Samuel Prepared David for Kingship:
- He Anointed David and Confirmed His Calling – Recognizing his potential before anyone else (1 Samuel 16:12-13).
- He Taught Him the Weight of Responsibility and Empathy – Leadership is about serving, not ruling (Deuteronomy 17:18-20).
- He Instilled the Importance of a Close Relationship with God – Faith must always come before leadership (1 Samuel 19:18-20).
- He Guided Him in Making Wise Decisions – Learning from Saul’s mistakes and seeking wisdom (1 Samuel 13:13-14).
- He Helped David Stay Humble and Faithful – Success should never lead to pride but deeper dependence on God (Psalm 18:2).
Final Challenge:
- Who is speaking into your life and preparing you for what God has called you to do?
- Are you willing to receive correction, wisdom, and guidance?
- Like David, are you allowing God to shape you through spiritual mentorship?
The Importance of Submitting to a Spiritual Father
God has designed spiritual leadership as part of His plan to shape, guide, and grow His people. Just as we need friends and a spiritual family, we also need spiritual fathers—mentors and leaders who can speak into our lives with wisdom and authority.
However, for a spiritual father to be effective, we must willingly submit to their guidance. Submission is not about control, but about honor, trust, and humility in recognizing the wisdom and covering that God has placed over us.
David’s relationship with Samuel demonstrates the power of submission to godly leadership and teaches us why we must have a spiritual father.
1. God Uses Spiritual Fathers to Shape Our Calling
A. David Submitted to Samuel Before Becoming King
1 Samuel 16:12-13 – “Then the LORD said, ‘Arise, anoint him; for this is the one!’ Then Samuel took the horn of oil and anointed him in the midst of his brothers; and the Spirit of the LORD came upon David from that day forward.”
- Samuel recognized David’s calling before anyone else did, understanding the unique potential and divine purpose that lay within him, even when others doubted his abilities or overlooked his humble beginnings.
- Without Samuel’s mentorship, David might never have stepped into his destiny as king, as he provided the guidance and wisdom needed for David to embrace his potential and fulfill his God-given purpose in leading the nation of Israel.
B. A Spiritual Father Sees What God Has Placed Inside of You
In 1 Samuel 16:7, it is written, "But the Lord said to Samuel, 'Do not look at his appearance or at the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.'" This passage reminds us that a true spiritual father perceives the intrinsic potential and divine purpose that God has placed within each of us.
- 2 Timothy 1:6-7 – “Therefore I remind you to stir up the gift of God which is in you through the laying on of my hands.”
- Paul reminded Timothy that a spiritual father helps activate and awaken the gifts inside of us through guidance, support, and encouragement, nurturing our potential to grow and flourish in our spiritual journey.
- We need someone who can recognize and call out the anointing in our lives, helping us to acknowledge and cultivate the unique gifts and talents that God has bestowed upon us, encouraging us to fully embrace our divine purpose and mission.
C. Submission to a Spiritual Father Brings Protection and Direction
Submitting to a spiritual father can serve as a profound source of protection and guidance in one's life. It is not merely an act of obedience, but rather a commitment to embrace the wisdom and insights that a seasoned mentor provides. This submission fosters a deeper connection, allowing the spiritual father to discern the unique challenges and temptations one might face. In turn, this relationship creates a safe environment where one can seek advice, share struggles, and experience genuine support. The spiritual father's role transcends that of a guide; he becomes a shield against spiritual warfare, helping to navigate through life's uncertainties with divine insight and clarity. By heeding his counsel, individuals often find themselves aligned with their purpose, equipped to make decisions that honor their spiritual journey while receiving the protective grace that comes from such a profound relationship.
- Hebrews 13:17 – “Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they are keeping watch over your souls, as those who will have to give an account. Let them do this with joy and not with groaning, for that would be of no advantage to you.”
- Spiritual fathers are responsible for guiding and protecting us spiritually, offering wisdom, support, and a safe environment in which we can grow in our faith and develop our understanding of spiritual truths.
- We must willingly submit to the leadership and guidance of others so that they can fulfill their role with joy, not frustration, understanding that this cooperation fosters a more harmonious and productive environment for all involved.
“A spiritual father sees beyond where you are and helps shape where you are going.”
Application
- Have you submitted your life to a spiritual mentor?
- Are you open to receiving their wisdom and correction?
2. A Spiritual Father Provides Correction and Accountability
A. David Had a Teachable Heart and Listened to the Voice of Authority
1 Samuel 19:18-20 – “Now David fled and escaped, and came to Samuel at Ramah and told him all that Saul had done to him. And he and Samuel went and stayed at Naioth.”
- When David was in trouble, he ran to Samuel, not away from him, seeking comfort and guidance in a moment of crisis, demonstrating the importance of having a trusted friend by his side.
- Many people reject correction when they face difficulties, but David valued Samuel’s wisdom, recognizing that in moments of hardship, it was crucial to be open to guidance and support from those who have more experience.
B. A Spiritual Father Helps Keep You from Destructive Decisions
A Spiritual Father Helps Keep You from Destructive Decisions
- Proverbs 12:1 – “Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but whoever hates correction is stupid.”
- Submission to a mentor protects us from mistakes that could delay or destroy our destiny, offering invaluable guidance and support that helps navigate challenges and enhances personal growth along our journey toward success.
- Rebellion leads to destruction, but correction leads to growth.
C. Those Who Reject Correction Fall Into Danger
- Proverbs 15:22 – “Without counsel, plans fail, but with many advisers, they succeed.”
- Those who refuse to listen to wise counsel often make decisions that lead to failure.
- God places mentors in our lives to prevent unnecessary pain and failure.
“Correction is not rejection; it is protection.”
Application
- Are you willing to receive correction from your spiritual father?
- Do you see correction as God’s protection, or do you resist it?
3. A Spiritual Father Helps Us Walk in Maturity and Wisdom
A. David Was Patient in the Process and Did Not Force His Own Way
- 1 Samuel 24:6-7 – “And he said to his men, ‘The LORD forbid that I should do this thing to my master, the LORD’s anointed…’ So David restrained his servants with these words, and did not permit them to rise against Saul.”
- Even though David was anointed as king, he waited for God’s timing and did not take matters into his own hands.
- A spiritual father teaches us patience, wisdom, and trust in God’s process.
B. We Need a Mentor Who Gives Us Three Types of Input
Spiritual Direction – Teaching us how to walk with God.
Moral and Character Correction – Helping us develop integrity.
Practical Wisdom – Teaching us leadership, decision-making, and accountability.
- Proverbs 13:20 – “Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.”
C. We Must Submit Willingly, Not Begrudgingly
- 1 Peter 5:5 – “Likewise, you who are younger, be subject to the elders. Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for ‘God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.’”
- Submission to spiritual fathers is an act of humility, demonstrating respect and trust in their guidance, nurturing a deeper connection within the spiritual community and fostering personal growth.
- Pride resists correction, but humility embraces it, recognizing that growth is a journey that requires an open heart and mind, understanding that constructive feedback is a valuable tool for personal development and improvement.
“A spiritual father teaches you not just how to succeed, but how to be ready for success.”
Application
- Are you patient in the process, or are you trying to force your own way?
- Do you have a spiritual father who gives you direction, correction, and wisdom?
Conclusion: Submission to a Spiritual Father is a Key to Growth
Three Reasons Why We Need to Submit to a Spiritual Father:
- They Shape Our Calling – They see our potential and help activate our gifts.
- They Provide Correction and Accountability – They protect us from destructive choices.
- They Teach Us Maturity and Wisdom – They help us walk in patience, integrity, and leadership.
Final Challenge:
- Are you actively submitting to a spiritual father who can speak into your life?
- Do you willingly receive correction, or do you resist it?
- Will you humble yourself and allow God to shape you through mentorship?
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